Things Teenagers Say...Volume Five
Actual Conversations of Late
Previous Volumes
Student: Do y'all believe inwards ghosts?
Me: No
Student: You know this schoolhouse is haunted, right?
Me: We need to motility on amongst our lesson. If it was Halloween, I would hold out to a greater extent than than happy to utter virtually ghosts. Sadly, it's Christmas. And, Christmas has zilch to create amongst ghosts.
Student: What virtually the ghosts of Christmas past, present, together with future?
Me: Well...you've got me there. We soundless convey to learn dorsum to our lesson, though.
Another Student: You merely got boomeranged!
Apparently, ane of our English linguistic communication teachers calls it boomeranging somebody when y'all assay them wrong. I estimate they did boomerang me...
--
Me: Put upward your phone.
Student: Okay.
<Two minutes later>
Me: I tin run across that. Put upward your phone.
Student: Oh, I truly sentiment y'all weren't going to run across me that time.
Me: Don't y'all know I convey an all-seeing eye?
Student: What?
Me: I convey an all-seeing eye.
Student: You convey an ulcer inwards your eye?
Me: No...
--
I don't know why I'm similar this today. Usually, everything y'all tell is NOT funny to me.. But, today everything y'all tell is funny. I estimate it's the Christmas spirit within of me or something.
Thanks...
--
<While discussing a futurity human relationship province of affairs that I mightiness notice myself inwards someday. For this to brand sense, y'all create convey to know that I'm a vegetarian.>
He'll hold out eating a 48 ounce steak, together with you'll hold out eating a 48 ounce salad.
This was followed, of course, past times uproarious laughter from my entire class. Oooh...what would a 48 ounce salad expect like? What size bowl would it hold out in? I tin run across a math work forming...
--
While making an ordered pair foldable:
Me: When y'all opened upward up the exterior flaps of the foldable, y'all volition notice about other foldable inside. Isn't it merely adorable?
Student: I run across what y'all did there.
<Laughter>
Me: I don't learn it.
Student: A"door"able
Me: Pun unintended. That time. It volition hold out definitely intended, though, for the residue of the day!
--
Me: Can y'all believe that tomorrow is November?
Student: No. What calendar month comes next? January?
Obviously, this conversation took house on Halloween...
--
Student: Why create nosotros convey to learn to schoolhouse on Halloween?
Me: Because it's non a National holiday.
Student: But, they celebrate it all across the US. Doesn't that arrive national?
I estimate I should convey said federal holiday. They did convey a point.
--
After telling students a joke that a modest fry at my church building shared amongst me:
"That's together with then funny I brutal off my pet dinosaur."
"That's together with then funny I convey tears running downwards my leg."
--
I named my fish "Smithy." It's truly brusk for "Will Smith." I named him that because he's my alone dark fish.
So terrible.
--
So, y'all drive a grandma car, y'all ain a bunch of cats, together with y'all convey a box of barbies inwards your cabinet. I'm worried virtually you.
My students brand me experience together with then loved. And, for the record, I create non ain a cat. And, I don't retrieve I drive a grandma car. I create convey a box of barbies, however. How else could nosotros create Barbie Bungee afterwards inwards the year???
--
One day, I didn't notice the lights flicker. This led to this proclamation:
"Either we're all on meth together with you're not, or you're on meth."
--
Ms. Hagan, I convey something I need to learn off my chest. My cousin thinks you're cute, together with he wants me to inquire y'all out for him...but he's form of a blank space...
I convey no sentiment who her cousin is, together with I don't fifty-fifty desire to know.
--
Me: Why does everybody decease along commenting on my hair?
Student: Well, it does expect similar y'all merely woke up.
Another Student: Have y'all been exterior recently?
Me: No.
Yet Another Student: Maybe you've stood past times an opened upward window recently? (I retrieve this daughter was truly trying to arrive better...)
Me: No.
Next time, I volition merely decease along my observations to myself!
--
Me: If y'all can't hold out kind, hold out quiet.
Student: Wait! I sentiment it was if y'all can't hold out kind, tell 2 overnice things.
--
I saw hexaflexagons inwards my dream final night.
Yes!
--
Student: Ms. Hagan, tin I come upward inwards hither at lunch?
Me: Yes. You tin e'er come upward inwards my room at lunch.
<Student stalks off, angrily.>
Student: I convey dark contacts in. No ane has noticed my unlike oculus coloring all day.
--
While going to the H2O outflow to refill my H2O bottle:
Student: What's the shout out of your bottle?
Me: George
Student: Mine is named Franklin.
And, for the record, his bottle was ghost-shaped because it was ane of those Halloween political party favors. And, I truly don't refer to my bottle equally George. I made upward a shout out on the location merely to run across how my educatee would respond.
--
Student: What twenty-four hours create nosotros exit for Christmas Break?
Me: Dec 20th
Student: You hateful they're making us come upward to schoolhouse on Christmas Eve?!?
Me: No, nosotros don't convey schoolhouse on Christmas Eve.
Student: What twenty-four hours is Christmas?
Me: What twenty-four hours create y'all think Christmas is?
Student: Well, I sentiment it was on the 21st, but that would brand Christmas Eve on the 20th. And, y'all said nosotros didn't convey schoolhouse on Christmas Eve.
--
Student: Are y'all Amish?
Me: No
Another Student: Just to hold out honest, y'all create expect Amish. You convey an Amish haircut.
Because side-swept bangs together with lots of layers merely yells Amish, right?
--
Student: I'm together with then excited. The Dallas Cowboys are going to hold out playing the Green Bakers.
Me: Who are they going to hold out playing?
Student: The Green Bakers.
Me: Are y'all certain they're going to hold out playing The Green Bakers?
Student: Yeah.
Me: I don't know a lot virtually football, but I'm pretty certain they're going to hold out playing The Green Bay Packers.
Student: That's what I said.
I don't know why I'm similar this today. Usually, everything y'all tell is NOT funny to me.. But, today everything y'all tell is funny. I estimate it's the Christmas spirit within of me or something.
Thanks...
--
<While discussing a futurity human relationship province of affairs that I mightiness notice myself inwards someday. For this to brand sense, y'all create convey to know that I'm a vegetarian.>
He'll hold out eating a 48 ounce steak, together with you'll hold out eating a 48 ounce salad.
This was followed, of course, past times uproarious laughter from my entire class. Oooh...what would a 48 ounce salad expect like? What size bowl would it hold out in? I tin run across a math work forming...
--
While making an ordered pair foldable:
Me: When y'all opened upward up the exterior flaps of the foldable, y'all volition notice about other foldable inside. Isn't it merely adorable?
Student: I run across what y'all did there.
<Laughter>
Me: I don't learn it.
Student: A"door"able
Me: Pun unintended. That time. It volition hold out definitely intended, though, for the residue of the day!
--
Me: Can y'all believe that tomorrow is November?
Student: No. What calendar month comes next? January?
Obviously, this conversation took house on Halloween...
--
Student: Why create nosotros convey to learn to schoolhouse on Halloween?
Me: Because it's non a National holiday.
Student: But, they celebrate it all across the US. Doesn't that arrive national?
I estimate I should convey said federal holiday. They did convey a point.
--
After telling students a joke that a modest fry at my church building shared amongst me:
"That's together with then funny I brutal off my pet dinosaur."
"That's together with then funny I convey tears running downwards my leg."
--
I named my fish "Smithy." It's truly brusk for "Will Smith." I named him that because he's my alone dark fish.
So terrible.
--
So, y'all drive a grandma car, y'all ain a bunch of cats, together with y'all convey a box of barbies inwards your cabinet. I'm worried virtually you.
My students brand me experience together with then loved. And, for the record, I create non ain a cat. And, I don't retrieve I drive a grandma car. I create convey a box of barbies, however. How else could nosotros create Barbie Bungee afterwards inwards the year???
--
One day, I didn't notice the lights flicker. This led to this proclamation:
"Either we're all on meth together with you're not, or you're on meth."
--
Ms. Hagan, I convey something I need to learn off my chest. My cousin thinks you're cute, together with he wants me to inquire y'all out for him...but he's form of a blank space...
I convey no sentiment who her cousin is, together with I don't fifty-fifty desire to know.
--
Me: Why does everybody decease along commenting on my hair?
Student: Well, it does expect similar y'all merely woke up.
Another Student: Have y'all been exterior recently?
Me: No.
Yet Another Student: Maybe you've stood past times an opened upward window recently? (I retrieve this daughter was truly trying to arrive better...)
Me: No.
Next time, I volition merely decease along my observations to myself!
--
Me: If y'all can't hold out kind, hold out quiet.
Student: Wait! I sentiment it was if y'all can't hold out kind, tell 2 overnice things.
--
I saw hexaflexagons inwards my dream final night.
Yes!
--
Student: Ms. Hagan, tin I come upward inwards hither at lunch?
Me: Yes. You tin e'er come upward inwards my room at lunch.
<Student stalks off, angrily.>
Student: I convey dark contacts in. No ane has noticed my unlike oculus coloring all day.
--
While going to the H2O outflow to refill my H2O bottle:
Student: What's the shout out of your bottle?
Me: George
Student: Mine is named Franklin.
And, for the record, his bottle was ghost-shaped because it was ane of those Halloween political party favors. And, I truly don't refer to my bottle equally George. I made upward a shout out on the location merely to run across how my educatee would respond.
--
Student: What twenty-four hours create nosotros exit for Christmas Break?
Me: Dec 20th
Student: You hateful they're making us come upward to schoolhouse on Christmas Eve?!?
Me: No, nosotros don't convey schoolhouse on Christmas Eve.
Student: What twenty-four hours is Christmas?
Me: What twenty-four hours create y'all think Christmas is?
Student: Well, I sentiment it was on the 21st, but that would brand Christmas Eve on the 20th. And, y'all said nosotros didn't convey schoolhouse on Christmas Eve.
--
Student: Are y'all Amish?
Me: No
Another Student: Just to hold out honest, y'all create expect Amish. You convey an Amish haircut.
Because side-swept bangs together with lots of layers merely yells Amish, right?
--
Student: I'm together with then excited. The Dallas Cowboys are going to hold out playing the Green Bakers.
Me: Who are they going to hold out playing?
Student: The Green Bakers.
Me: Are y'all certain they're going to hold out playing The Green Bakers?
Student: Yeah.
Me: I don't know a lot virtually football, but I'm pretty certain they're going to hold out playing The Green Bay Packers.
Student: That's what I said.
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