Things Teenagers Say: Book 24

So, I've decided that my motivation of belatedly for blogging is pure procrastination.  At the moment, I'm procrastinating on cleaning my solid past times typing upward this post.  The washer as well as dryer are both running at the moment, thus this nonetheless counts equally beingness totally productive, right? ;)

Also - where has this semester gone?!?  Just a few to a greater extent than days until Christmas Break!  I don't know how I'm going to grapple alongside non hearing crazy things come upward out of the mouths of teenagers for a duo of weeks...


Previous Volumes:
Volume 1 | Volume 2 | Volume 3 | Volume 4 | Volume 5  
Volume 6 | Volume 7 | Volume 8 | Volume 9 | Volume 10
Volume 11 | Volume 12 | Volume 13 | Volume 14 | Volume 15
Volume 16 | Volume 17 | Volume 18 | Volume 19 | Volume 20
Volume 21 | Volume 22 | Volume 23



While playing review Jeopardy...

Student: But, Ms. Hagan, you're non fifty-fifty playing.
Me: Hello! I'm Alex Trebek.
Student: Who is that?
Me: [No words...]

--

Ms. Hagan, I cry back you lot should move an Aztec warrior.

--

When you lot were little, did you lot lick the idiot box when Veggie Tales came on?

#vegetarianteacherprobs

--

Student: I audio to a greater extent than similar a parakeet than a goat.

--

Student: Do you lot know how many letters are inwards the give-and-take perfect? 7. Do you lot know what else has seven letters? 
Me: Ms. Hagan.

--

Student: Ms. Hagan, are you lot Internet famous?  Did you lot know virtually network famous people sit down at abode eating chips as well as petting their cats?  I bet you lot sit down at abode eating chips as well as petting your plants.

--

Student comment land I was typing:

You audio similar a paper maker. 

--

Really? Math on Halloween?!? That is NOT fair.

--

Student 1: Do you lot simply acquire abode as well as sit down inwards your room as well as practise math?
Me: Yes. (Sarcastically)
Student 1: Really?
Me: No.  Guys, I actually practise accept a life.
Student 1: Yeah.  You accept cats.
Student 2: Actually, she has plants.  Get it right!

--

Melted cheese fills the scissure inwards a broken heart.

--

If your swain breaks upward alongside you, are you lot going to initiative of all giving us lots of homework?

--

Student: Ms. Hagan, did you lot know that in that place are dissimilar Americas?
Me: What practise you lot hateful in that place are dissimilar Americas?
Student:  Guys, Ms. Hagan didn't know that in that place are 3 dissimilar Americas either.
Me: And, what are the 3 dissimilar Americas?
Student: Well, there's North America, South America, as well as America America.  Did you lot actually non know that?!?
Me: I knew that.  Did you lot simply acquire that?
Student: Yes.  But, what I don't acquire is why isn't Africa also named America?

--

If I brand a B on this quiz, I'm going to kiss you.

--

Student: Look at my arm!
Me: Oh no.  What did you lot do?
Student: Well, I was chasing a ass downwards the route on my motorcycle...

--

Student: Ms. Hagan, is it against your religious belief to vesture jeans every day?
Me: No.  You practise know that teachers are solely allowed to vesture jeans on Fridays, right?
Student:  But, you lot could nonetheless vesture pants or slacks.  Instead, you lot vesture dresses as well as skirts every day.
Me:  I was wearing slacks yesterday.
Student:  The way you lot clothes is erstwhile as well as tardily looking.
Me: Okay then...

--

Student 1: How practise you lot spell pedophile?
Student 2: Just google it.  I google how to spell pedophile all the time.

--

This isn't a cheat sheet.  A cheat canvas would plough over me the answers.  This is a cry back sheet.

--

Student: Ms. Hagan, I took a painting of your solid this weekend.
Me: That's kinda creepy.
Student: Do you lot desire to see?
Me: Sure.
Student: [Shows Picture on Phone]
Me: That's non my house.
Student: Oh, I knew that.  But, the solid had 5 cats inwards the front end yard thus it made me cry back of you.

--

Instead of chocolate, your swain could purchase you lot a bouquet of celery.

--

It's non called stalking.  It's called next your dreams.

--

Do you lot know what's dumber than a box of rocks?  A box of sticks.

--

Student: Ms. Hagan, I cry back I necessitate to acquire a life.
Me: Why?
Student: Because I've started going abode as well as doing math.

--

He's non late; he's fashionably non present.

--

I'd rather consume a human than a truthful cat or domestic dog if I was starving.

--

Student 1: You can't boil materials inwards the bathroom tub.
Student 2: Yes you lot can.  Just our gasoline inwards as well as educate it on fire.

--

One pupil to another: He called you lot "sweetheart."  That agency he is equally good erstwhile for you.  You simply got friend-zoned.

--

Student 1: Who's Noah?
Student 2: Noah as well as the Ark.
Student 1: I've never seen that movie.
Student 2: It's inwards the Bible.

--

I dearest kangaroos.  They accept that pouch.  I simply desire to climb within that pouch.

--

My mucilage told me to non head to you lot for the adjacent 10 minutes.

--

One pupil to another: If you lot acquire that to a greater extent than or less my human face upward again, I'm going to assume you lot desire me to kiss you.  So, I'm going to lick your face.

--

When you lot trip as well as autumn as well as the spaghetti falls out of your pocket...

--

Do you lot know what I institute out?  There's a twenty-four hr menses called Daughter's Day.  My parents accept been hiding this fact from me.  My mom gets Mother's Day, as well as my dad gets Father's Day.  They each acquire their ain especial day.  I should acquire my ain especial day.  I mean, I'm thus special.  I'm similar the s Baby Jesus.  I'm the Virgin Mary of 2014.

--

What would you lot accept to practise to move inwards a math play?
You'd accept to "addition." 

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